February 27, 2007

Public Relations 101

Today's scientific study results:
Garlic does not lower cholesterol.
Antioxidents do not prolong life.

Today's anecdotal observation:
Following up on Press Releases with newspaper editors is analogous to self flaggilation in sack cloth.

February 05, 2007

Nyah Nyah Nyah Nyah NYAH Nyah

Kindly refer to the following in my August 9 post
I am in a slight funk from Super Bowl to the pre-season opening game. When football season starts, I ascend from my dour mood, and look forward to seeing if Peyton and Eli are going to choke at the end of the season, whether my favorite coach (Tony Dungee) will win more games than my least favorite coach (the evil Bill Parcells), and whether T.O. is going to pull himself together and play like the egotistical diamond-studded running back he is. Joy!
Good has overcome eeeevil. Peyton didn't choke, Tony won the SuperBowl and Bill Parcells retired.
There is a god.
Her name is Erzulie.

December 22, 2006

See You Next Year!

December 21, 2006

Divine Intervention


Before my computer is sent to hybernate for the rest of the year, I finish with my sincere hope that you embrace Astrology, and contemplate the similarities of those with whom I share my Sagitarial sign:
On my birthday - Don Johnson. (Much older, of course)
Around my birthday - Bette Midler, Richard Pryor, Woody Allen, Britney Spears, Gianni Vercace, Daryl Hannah, Ozzy Osbourne, Jeff Bridges, General George Custer, Walt Disney, Babyface Nelson, Jim Morrison, Kim Bassinger, Beau Bridges, John Malkovich, Brenda Lee, Frank Sinatra, Nostradamus and Beethovan.
If that isn't enough to convert you, then just go ahead and believe in your "scientific" what-have-you, and know that, as a unique combination of the above mentioned Captains of Humanhood, I personally can be explained only with the assistance of Divine Intervention.
Ask The Divine Miss M.

December 20, 2006

La Sirine


Vodou Kitty wishes you a very Happy Saint Nicholas Day, Happy Fiesta of Our Lady of Guadalupe, Happy St. Lucia Day, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Solstice, Merry Christmas, Happy Kwansaa, Happy Boxing Day, Happy Omisoka and Happy Eid'ul-Adha.

December 19, 2006

Joy to the world, the Lord is come!


December 7, 2006


Bill Donohue, president of the Catholic League, and Don Feder, president of Jews Against Anti-Christian Defamation, have launched a “Why I Hate Christmas” contest today. Donohue explains as follows:

“On December 6, a Zogby Poll disclosed that 95 percent of Americans are not offended by being greeted with a ‘Merry Christmas’ while shopping. Don Feder and I would like to know more about the 5 percent who object and have thus launched our ‘Why I Hate Christmas’ contest. Contestants must answer the following questions:

1) Explain relationship with father

2) Explain relationship with mother

3) State what religion, if any, were you raised in

4) List all phobias, e.g., fear of God

5) List all superstitions, e.g., belief in global warming

6) State which historical figure is most like you: (a) Hitler (b) Stalin (c) Mao (d) Pol Pot (e) Rosie O’Donnell

7) State last time you hallucinated

8) State last book you read before crashing

9) State how many times you’ve laughed in the past 10 years: (a) once (b) more than once but not more than thrice (c) more than thrice but not more than five times (d) can’t recall

10) List all prior mental disorders

“Please send us a photo so we can post your picture on our website, along with your response. The winner will receive a free copy of the Charles Dickens classic, A Christmas Carol. Finally, we will send your statement to Jackie Mason for a free psychological evaluation.”

The Catholic League is the nation's largest Catholic civil rights organization. It defends individual Catholics and the institutional Church from defamation and discrimination.

December 18, 2006

Big Slide

Bigger Slide

Not long ago, we were Astorian bon vivants. We threw parties, were invited to parties, and mixed often with our favorite people.
Times have changed.
Astoria is a lonely place now, with few gatherings - even during the holiday season. Some with whom we were once inseparable now don't even bother sending me a birthday card, much less going to dinner, or getting together for drinks or a visit.
Paul thinks it's because we're moving, but I think not. It started before then - nothing substantial, but less phone calls, more gatherings in which we were not included... Something happened, and I don't know what.
I've racked my brains...what did I say? what did I do? what did I NOT say? what didn't I do?
We drew a blank. Neither of us can figure it out.
All I want for Christmas is my house to sell. It's too cold up here to feel cold on the inside, too.